Believe The Truth Not All Women

by Yvonne Chase on June 6, 2022

Who came up with the statement, “Believe all women?” I believe the #MeToo movement initiated it. Essentially it means a man is presumed to be guilty whenever a woman claims abuse. Innocent until proven guilty does not exist. Does anyone else see how dangerous this is? How can you believe all women when women lie? I do not believe all women or all people because Jeremiah 17:9 says, “The heart is deceitful above all things, and desperately wicked: who can know it?”

believe

“#BelieveAllWomen” was inescapable on social media as the jury deliberated Depp vs. Heard. I stood with Deep because I lived with Heard. I know first-hand what a person like Amber Heard is capable of. If you watched the trial, specifically the cross-examination of Amber by Camille Vasquez; Amber turned her head to the jury when answering the questions instead of looking at Camille. Body-language experts say looking away is a clear indicator of lying. Amber was caught in a web of lies throughout the trial. On the other hand, Johnny answered every question before and during cross-examination directly to the attorney looking at each person head-on. He did not look away at the jury to try to impress them.

On June 1st, the verdict came forth in favor of Johnny Depp. If you did not know, June 1st is World Narcissistic Abuse Awareness Day. The verdict sends a strong message to perpetrators of narcissistic abuse also known as domestic violence, that you cannot lie, defame, torture, and create smear campaigns and get away with it. The verdict also reminds the world that men are victims of domestic violence and abuse.

During the trial, Depp said, “Truth is worth fighting for,” and after the verdict, he said, “Truth never perishes. From the very beginning, the goal of bringing this case was to reveal the truth, regardless of the outcome. I hope that my quest to have the truth be told will have helped others, men or women, who have found themselves in my situation and that those supporting them never give up.”

believe

Society often views domestic violence as physical abuse by men against women, which justifies female violence primarily as self-defense (Dutton & Corvo, 2006). In one of the many audios played during the trial, Amber admitted to hitting Johnny, yet she minimized her actions by saying, “I did not punch you. I am sorry I did not hit you across the face in a proper slap; I was hitting you. I was not punching you. Babe, you are not punched. You know you have been in a lot of fights; you did not get punched; you got hit. I did not punch you. I did not deck you. I was hitting you. I do not know what the actual motion of my hand was, but you are fine. I did not hurt you. I did not punch you. I was hitting you. You are a baby. Grow up, Johnny.”

According to Hine et al. (2020), the early study on domestic violence and abuse (DVA) assumes that the violence happens because men have a need to control and dominate. The root of this idea is patriarchal norms that highlight and facilitate male privilege. Studies exploring the prevalence of female-on-male DVA have identified substantial physical aggression toward men, including kicking, biting, choking, scratching, and the use of weapons (Drijber et al., 2013; Hines et al., 2007). As a result, male victims go unnoticed and remain a "secret" victim group. 

Importantly, studies have revealed that one-third of battered men suffer significant harm due to female-initiated abuse. Additionally, control over personal freedom (e.g., limiting the use of mobile phones, engaging in social activities), manipulation and isolation (e.g., using children against a partner, threatening false allegations, falsifying pregnancy), gaslighting (e.g., making men doubt their perception of the world and sanity), humiliation (e.g., belittlement, lowering self-esteem), and promotion of fear and uncertainty were all revealed as controlling tactics.

We cannot live in a world that blindly believes all women when there is mounting evidence that women are perpetrators of domestic violence and abuse. If you do not know any dishonest, deceitful women, let me introduce you to Potiphar’s wife, who tried to trap Joseph.

In her book Wicked Women of the Bible (gotta love the title), Anne Spangler describes Potiphar as, “A high-ranking Egyptian woman who fell for a good-looking Hebrew slave by the name of Joseph. Enraged by his refusal to jump into bed with her, she accused him of attempted rape and had him thrown into prison.”

And what about Eve—the original Bad Girl of the Bible? God told her not to eat of the fruit in the Garden of Eden, yet she chose to listen to the serpent and deceive Adam into eating the fruit. If you read the Bible, you will find an extensive list of wicked women which lets us know wicked women are in the world. Therefore, we must test the spirits when a woman or anyone comes forward with an accusation. 1 John 4:1 says, “Beloved, do not believe every spirit but test the spirits to see whether they are from God, for many false prophets have gone out into the world.”

This verse is a reminder and warning to Christians to be aware of false prophets and wolves in sheep’s clothing; however, it is pertinent in all areas of life. Test the spirits simply means listening with a discerning ear. It means to examine and investigate. When Amber came forward initially, she was believed; however, her claims were tested and found to be false. We cannot blindly believe all people at face value without supporting evidence.

Something to think about…

What say you? What are your thoughts on, “#BelieveAllWomen” and DVA against men? 

Here are 2 things I would like you to do now:

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Reference:
Hine, B., Bates, E. A., & Wallace, S. (2020). “I have guys call me and say ‘I can’t be the victim of domestic abuse’”: Exploring the experiences of telephone support providers for male victims of domestic violence and abuse. Journal of Interpersonal Violence, 37(7-8). https://doi.org/10.1177/088626052094455
 
Maryleigh June 6, 2022

Let’s not forget about Rachel, either – who sold her husband for fruit and who hid her idols. As a mom of sons-only, I am more sensitive to the male bashing culture – and it breaks my heart. No – you cannot believe all woman just like you cannot believe all men. Dishonesty and malice are not limited to just one sex – and to believe that it is is the height of ridiculousness! Thank you, Yvonne, for tackling the truth and abuse of such lightning-rod topic!
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Yvonne Chase June 15, 2022

@Maryleigh,

Yes, Rachel! How could we forget her! I empathize with you as you raise your boys in our current male-bashing culture. I often say if I were a man, I would not entertain women unless I were surrounded by a flood of witnesses. We are living in a very dangerous culture! Love this: “Dishonesty and malice are not limited to one sex.” My mind is blown that anyone would ever believe it is. Utterly ridiculous!
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Lauren Renee Sparks June 6, 2022

I agree this is a dangerous construct.
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Yvonne Chase June 15, 2022

@Lauren,

Extremely dangerous because it sets the stage for any woman to make up a lie about a man that could ruin his entire life.
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Paula Short June 7, 2022

Amen Yvonne. I couldn’t agree with you more. This is a topic that really needed to be said. Thank you for talking about it.
Thank you for linking up with Sweet Tea & Friends this month.
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Yvonne Chase June 15, 2022

@Paula,

I don’t understand why anyone would ever think #BelieveAllWomen is okay. Why was this statement ever allowed to exist!
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Jeanne Takenaka June 7, 2022

Yvonne, I agree. Humans are deceptive…not just men. Not just women. Testing the spirits by listening to peoples’ words and body language and listening to the Spirit is the best way to discern what to believe, or not believe.

Yvonne Chase June 15, 2022

@Jeanne,

Exactly! Humans are deceptive and women are not exempt.
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Barbara Harper June 7, 2022

I didn’t follow the trial, but I agree with you very much. All men are not guilty (except in the sense that we’re all sinners) and all women are not innocent. Each has ways of abusing the other, unfortunately.
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Yvonne Chase June 15, 2022

@Barbara,

Indeed. All men are not guilty and all women are not innocent. Both can be equally abusive.
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Joanne Viola June 9, 2022

As fallen people, we need to be so careful as both men and women are capable of abuse, lies, and manipulation. May we ever be asking the Lord to give us discernment so that we are able to see right from wrong clearly.

Yvonne Chase June 15, 2022

@Joanne,

We desperately need discernment!
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Karen Friday June 9, 2022

Yvonne, you make such valid and good points. How uncanny the verdict fell on a day about narcissism. You know my story and dealing with a narcissist in my extended family. Thankful for Depp’s statements about truth. I hope and pray the world was listening.
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Yvonne Chase June 15, 2022

@Karen,

I prayed hard that the truth would prevail. God answered my prayer on WNAAD. Not uncanny at all!
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Jan June 10, 2022

Everyone lies, sadly, both men and women. Slippery slope to emphasize otherwise just because of a popular movement.

Yvonne Chase June 15, 2022

@Jan,

Slippery slope indeed especially when attached to a movement that is terribly flawed and causes more harm than good.
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Jerralea June 13, 2022

The bible says there are none righteous; so why should we blindly accept a people group thinking they are always truthful?
I agree we all need more discernment and need to examine and look for the truth in all situations.
How ironic the verdict in the Depp/Heard trial came on Narcisstic Abuse Awareness Day!
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Yvonne Chase June 15, 2022

@Jerralea,

Thank you for adding this verse to the conversation. No people group is always truthful.
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Donna B Reidland June 15, 2022

You are so right. Jeremiah said it so clearly. Johnny Dep may have had his wrongs in their situation (not speaking specifically but talking about our sinful human nature, in general). But women can be just as sinful as any man. And we can never assume someone is guilty without knowing all the facts.
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Yvonne Chase June 15, 2022

@Donna,

You are so right. Johnny Depp owned his wrongs and spoke openly about the troubles in his life with drugs and alcohol plus he spoke openly about the brokenness in his childhood and upbringing. He owned his stuff and I believe that along with the mountains of envious gave him the victory.
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Barb Hegreberg June 15, 2022

Truth is truth, whether we agree with it or not!

People lie.
People choose to ignore facts that they don’t agree with.
People trust the wrong people or entities.

HOWEVER

People tell the truth.
People believe in the promises of God above all else.
People follow godly examples.

Visising from InstaEncouragements Link-up
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Linda Stoll June 15, 2022

Yvonne … as ever, you’ve given us some serious food for thought. you always make me think and consider and go a bit deeper.

i appreciate you.

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