Close the Door!

by Yvonne Chase on August 4, 2011

Yesterday on Twitter, singer Jill Scott created quite a stir when she tweeted her thoughts about open relationships and marriage.  Here’s what she said:

What do you think about “open relationships? Been considering.  Many friends are making it work. Not sure if I’m that girl but not sure if I’m not. Sometimes there’s an understanding that nobody else gets.  

I’m certain of what I want and deserve.  Still so many marriages fail.  Worth the questions.  Worth the thought.   For some it’s a turn on. 

Ok. Try This, the love of your life cheats and is honest about it. Your life with him/her is everything you want but monogamous. Do you stay?

Ima say this.   If YOU can handle it, it’s yours to handle.  Other people’s judgment matters not in this one life you have. Life is not black & pink.

While life may not be black and pink, marriage is black and white.   Teddy Pendergrass said close the door and I’m with him on that.  Marriage is the union of one man and one woman.  Marriage is the place to close the door and secure it with a dead bolt lock to keep out all outside forces that could potentially destroy it.

I believe a lack of self-control and wanting what we want when we want it is at the root of open marriages along with selfishness.  Whatever happened to boundaries? Now we just want to wake up and do whatever we want when we want.  There used to be right and wrong and there used to be things that would never be considered.  There’s no need for an open marriage when you can remain single.  In addition, open marriage is an oxymoron.  Once you marry, you are saying yes to your spouse and no to everyone else.

In the current issue of Enjoying Everyday Life, a magazine put out by Joyce Meyer Ministries, Dave Meyer, whose been married to Joyce in a closed marriage for over forty years asks, where did fidelity go?  He says, you’ve probably heard the term infidelity but the word fidelity is rarely used today.  It has been largely forgotten by our nations families and other institutions.  Fidelity was once a highly valued trait in American society.  Fidelity needs to be taught to our children for as John Adams once said, the vices and examples of the parents cannot be concealed from the children.  How is it possible that children can have any sense of the sacred obligations of morality if from their earliest infancy, they learn their mothers live in habitual infidelity to their father and their fathers in as constant infidelity to their mothers? Fidelity is something we all should do our best to practice.

So, what say you? Would you participate in an open marriage? Why? Why not? Is an open marriage the answer to infidelity? Is fidelity a thing of the past?


Michael August 4, 2011

I live in Los Angeles…the land of all sorts of crazy relationships. I think everyone is in an open relationship or marriage out here but you know what, that’s not for me. I could’ve stayed single for that. I love my wife too much and I’m not sharing her with anyone. I’m with you on that…open marriage is an oxymoron.

Jocelyn August 10, 2011

Open marriage is definitely not for me, especially because I believe that God wants us to keep our marriage bed pure (Hebrews 13:4). To me this means that you and your spouse are the only ones to participate in sexual acts with one another. People forget (or maybe don’t even know) that sex was created for husband and wife as a means to enhance their connection, and to procreate, but also as an act of worship to God. When we come together as one flesh, God is pleased. You cannot worship God by having multiple people in your marriage bed, especially when the Word says that every husband should have his OWN wife and vice versa (1 Cor 7:2). When did sex outside of your own marriage stop being enough??? My goodness the devil is busy!

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