A Deal Breaker Is Not Negotiable

by Yvonne Chase on April 22, 2015

Crazy Glued To The City
Last night, on Married At First Sight, the couples moved in together.   Did you watch? No worries.  I’m here to fill you in. Let’s start with Sean and Davina.  I hope I’m wrong about them, but I don’t think they’re going to stay married once the experiment ends.  It’s all about Davina and what she wants.  One of her deal breakers is living in Manhattan.  She is crazy glued to the city and she’s not moving for anyone.    

Huge Part Of Her Identity
She’s a woman of Indian descent who feels she has “arrived” now that she can afford to buy a place in Manhattan.  That’s a big deal considering her journey.  Sean has never spent more than 12 hours in Manhattan.  I think it’s totally unfair that he has to uproot his life and take it to Manhattan to make her happy.  It’s all about making Davina happy.  What about him? The experts did Sean a huge disservice by matching him with Davina.  They should’ve matched her with a city guy who is used to paying a lot of money for a tiny space.  

Relocate For A Mate
Sean lives in the suburbs of New Jersey in a spacious lovely home.  He is now forced to pay an exorbitant amount of money for a tiny apartment.  He did tell the experts he’d be willing to relocate for a mate.  Perhaps he needed to be more specific about where he’d be willing to relocate. I’m willing to relocate for a mate too, however, there are certain places I’m not going. Kansas anybody? NO!

It’s No Longer All About You
My girl Jaclyn has the right attitude.  She lives in New Jersey and her husband Ryan R. lives three hours and thirty minutes away in Stony Brook Long Island.  Her thought process was they need to find a place that works for both of them; their jobs, commutes, families etc. It’s not all about her.  Sure she would like to stay planted in New Jersey in her lovely home that’s already set up close to her job with her commute already mapped out but she has a husband and she has to consider what will work best for him too.   I loved it when she said, “Uprooting my life and moving to Queens is a big challenge but this is my new life.  I’m married now.”  Exactly.  You’re married now which means you have to think of someone else.  It’s no longer all about you.  They’ve decided on Astoria Queens which is a midpoint between New Jersey and Stony Brook. High five to Jaclyn and Ryan! LOVE them!

She Never Spoke Up
Jessica and Ryan D got a really nice apartment (love the exposed brick wall) and they handled the process well too.  She’s a saver. He’s a spender.  She works a 9 to 5.  He’s an entrepreneur that’s doing really well for himself.  She can only afford $1,000 towards their rent.  He can go up to $2,500.  They found a place that accommodates their combined budget and they’re both happy with their new home.  Moving in was a bit tense.  Ryan kind of delegated who was going to take what and Jessica didn’t like that, but she never spoke up.  She’s trying to avoid another outburst, but it’s going to happen in 3…2..1…

negotiable

Completely Out Of The Friend Zone
The only couple that looks like a sure thing this season is Jaclyn and Ryan.  They got off to a slow start and now she can’t keep her hands off of him.  He’s completely out of the friend zone.  Davina is selfish and needy.  Sean is going to get tired real quick of bending over backwards to make her happy.  The world does not revolve around what Davina wants.  Ryan D and his temper plus Jessica and her inability to speak up will probably be the death of their marriage.  

“The cohabitation is in some ways the real beginning of the marriage for our couples. You are working as a team. You are learning how to be a team and that is critical in a marriage.  And if they don’t learn it, they’re not going to have a marriage.”   Dr. Pepper Schwartz 

Something to think about…

What’s the best way for couples to move in together? Is it better to get a new place and start from scratch? Is a deal breaker ever negotiable?

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