FOSO And FOMO – One Is Good And The Other Is Bad

by Yvonne Chase on April 29, 2018

Water Your Grass
In my last post, I told you to water your own grass. This post is all about FOSO but before we get to it, many of you think the grass is greener on the other side. It’s not! If you water your grass, it will be green too. Try it! 

Better On The Other Side
Single people definitely need to water their own grass. You need to stop thinking life is better on the other side of marriage. What if you never marry? Even if you do marry, what makes you think life will be better? Based on what I see, hear and know, life gets really complicated when you marry simply because you now have a whole other person to deal with and consider.

Squandering Opportunity
The title of this post came about after listening to an interesting sermon about singleness. I had never heard of FOSO and I’m sure you haven’t either. Have you? We’re all familiar with FOMO; Fear Of Missing Out. FOSO is Fear Of Squandering Opportunity. I LOVE that!

Opportunities And Freedom
Are you squandering opportunity in your single life? In the pursuit of romantic love, I believe many of you are squandering opportunities. From the beginning of time when I started writing about living single, I talked forever and a day until I sounded like a scratched record about taking advantage of the opportunities and the freedoms that come with living single.

Adventure With Jesus
For example, I live in a city that’s not my cup of tea. As soon as I have peace about where to move, I’m out and I don’t have to check in or confirm this with anyone. The stuff I don’t want is going on Offer Up, then I’m calling the moving company to pack up my luxurious bed and the other items I do want and I’m buying an airline ticket to my new destination.

Living Reckless
At this place in your life, you have the opportunity to do a host of things and I’m not talking about living a reckless life devoid of responsibility. Instead, I’m talking about really leaning into your relationship with God to find out what he created you to do, be, and have.

Make A Difference
Why are you here on this earth? You’re not here to simply breathe and take up space. You have work to do. There’s a purpose for your life. God created you with gifts, talents, and abilities to use in a capacity that will make a difference in this world. I know what my gifts, talents, and abilities are. Do you? I know the call God has on my life, do you? 

Unload Baggage
In addition to finding out your gifts, talents, and abilities, how about unloading some of your baggage especially if you want to marry someday. That would be a great gift to your future spouse don’t ya think?

Need Healing
As I mentioned here, counseling and therapy are a gift from God himself. While God is the only person who can heal our broken hearts, a good counselor and or therapist can help us uncover those places that need healing.

Path To Healing
Within the last four years, life dealt me some hard blows that sent me right to the office of a great Christian counselor. Not only did she set me on the path to healing, she also walked me through a faith-based assessment that identified my personality type. Having this information is helpful to me as I use my gifts, talents, and abilities and walk out the call on my life.

Desperately Seeking
There is much to do with your single life besides desperately seeking romantic love and going in and out of relationships. As I said here, the more you go in and out of relationships, the more damaged you become.

Tarzan Swing
And that is why I absolutely love what R&B singer Keri Hilson says when she explains why she’s single. She says, “I’m single by choice. I believe in reflecting, growing, & healing in between relationships. I don’t Tarzan swing from vine to vine out of fear, loneliness, ego, or validation cuz I truly enjoy my life by myself, too. I’m not waiting or looking. The right one will find me when it’s time. I’m just focused on being the best human I can be. #truestory ❤️”

Desired End
Keri has the right idea. After a string of bad relationships, she’s made the wise choice to step away from dating and not squander any more of her time in relationships that don’t lead to her desired end.

Fall Victim
It’s what I’ve been preaching and teaching from day one. Don’t Tarzan swing from one relationship to the next. Instead, focus on being the best human being God created you to be and get you some FOSO. While FOMO wreaks havoc on our lives, FOSO is actually a good fear that will inspire you to use your time wisely.

Something to think about…

What say you? Is this your first time hearing about FOSO? What do you think about FOSO?

Here are 2 things I’d like you to do now:

1. Leave a comment below

2. Share this post if you like it

Laurie May 1, 2018

Thank you for explaining the difference. Loved it! Gotta get more FOSO in my life!
Laurie recently posted…What Can You Let Go Of?My Profile

Yvonne Chase May 7, 2018


FOSO is a good thing…
Yvonne Chase recently posted…How To Keep A Man In One Easy StepMy Profile

Stacey Pardoe May 1, 2018

Such powerful truth here, Yvonne! I love the way you weave practical applications into the Truth of Scripture! May we grasp the opportunities set before us!

Yvonne Chase May 7, 2018


Indeed, we must grasp the opportunities set before us otherwise we will miss out.
Yvonne Chase recently posted…Toilet Paper, Dating And The Paradox Of ChoiceMy Profile

Karen Friday May 1, 2018

Another new and fresh post, Yvonne. Love the meaning of FOSO. Who knew! Thanks for sharing.

Yvonne Chase May 7, 2018


When I first heard it and learned the meaning of it, I couldn’t keep it to myself. It’s a good fear that we all need.
Yvonne Chase recently posted…God Did Not Design Me For Singleness, He Designed Me For MarriageMy Profile

Wrae Sanders May 1, 2018

I’d never heard of FOSO until I read this but it does sound very realistic.

Lauren Sparks May 1, 2018

I’m not single, but I HAD to find out what FOSO was! Great concept. Visiting you from the purposeful faith link up.
Lauren Sparks recently posted…Turning Friendship into Blendship – Fighting for True CommunityMy Profile

Michele Morin May 2, 2018

I feel this!
I don’t want to miss one thing that God has equipped me to do. And it’s very easy to settle for mundane on this busy planet. Trusting along with you for grace to hear the assignment and then obedience!
Michele Morin recently posted…The Miracle of Humanity (and Fairy Tales for Grown Ups)My Profile

Yvonne Chase May 7, 2018


Amen! No missing out on all God has equipped me to do. My ears are open to hearing the assignment and I’m ready to do it.
Yvonne Chase recently posted…How To Keep A Man In One Easy StepMy Profile

Betsy de Cruz May 4, 2018

Wow, I love this dynamite encouragement here! Thank you so much! May the Lord bless you and your ministry!

So glad I saw you ata #TellHisStory

Melanie Redd May 4, 2018

What a practical and powerful post, Yvonne!
I love this – FOSO!
Oh, Lord, don’t let me squander any more opportunities!
I’m linking for my friend Pam Blosser and today.

Amy @ The Quiet Homemaker May 4, 2018

This was great! I had never heard of FOSO, but I think that it is something that we should all have a little of in this life. When I was single I was always searching for that one person. God did not bring him until I stopped searching for him and searched for HIM! Thank you for a great post!

Thanks for linking up @LiveLifeWell


Amy @ The Quiet Homemaker recently posted…Live Life Well: Encouragement for the JourneyMy Profile

Roseann Hampton May 4, 2018

Enjoying what you have is certainly better than worrying about what you don’t! Well said Yvonne! Thanks for sharing at The Blogger’s Pit Stop! Roseann from This Autoimmune Life

Yvonne Chase May 7, 2018


Well said; enjoying what you have is better than worrying about what you might miss out on.
Yvonne Chase recently posted…How To Keep A Man In One Easy StepMy Profile

Kathleen - Bloggers Lifestyle May 7, 2018

Yvonne, this post has been popular on the Blogger’s Pit Stop so we are going to feature it. Thanks for a great post.

Yvonne Chase May 8, 2018


Thanks for featuring my content.

Blessings to you
Yvonne Chase recently posted…How To Keep A Man In One Easy StepMy Profile

Anne@CMM World Missions February 1, 2019

Thank you for that wonderful explanation Yvonne. No matter what’s happening in my life. I should keep moving!
Anne@CMM World Missions recently posted…January 2019, Cuba: Maida and RamonMy Profile

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