Is Purity Possible In Today’s Sexually Fluid Culture?

by Yvonne Chase on January 28, 2014

purity I Never Wanted To Be A Single Mother
I read a post the other day about a woman whose baby daddy proposed to another woman and married her while she was five months pregnant.  She said,  I never wanted to be a single mother.  It just happened.”  A comment on the post said, “Maybe they should stop having sex until they’re married.”  To which another reader replied, “That’s not realistic.  People aren’t going to do that today and we both know it.”

Don’t Do Anything
Earlier today, I listened to a podcast about sexuality and singles.  In a conversation about kissing and intimacy while dating, the guest, Elisabeth Elliott said “Until you find out by prayer and waiting on God that this is in fact the man or the woman he has for you, don’t do anything.  You do not need intimacy in order to discover the character of this person.  Character can be observed from a distance.  Intimacy contributes precisely nothing to the knowledge of character in fact it certainly is a revelation of a certain looseness of character.”

Looseness Of Character
There’s a lot of looseness of character today don’t you think?  We can’t get away from sex.  The intro to the podcast said, “In today’s culture, people mock the idea of purity. If you spend five minutes watching television or reading through some of the lyrics to the nation’s most popular songs–you will notice that many actors and artists place little value on purity, and place a high value on sexual freedom.”

Part Her Legs Like The Red Sea
We saw this in plain sight on Sunday’s opening act of the Grammy awards.  I’m not sure why a married woman and mother of a two year old girl needs to part her legs like the Red Sea, simulate sex with a chair, twerk then back her crotch up to the TV for all of America to see her nether region while singing explicit lyrics about what happens in her sex life with her husband.  My feelings would be the same if she were single.

Moments Of Deep Intimacy
Sex is in every song lyric, TV show, movie and even some commercials hint at sex.  We can’t get away from it.  Each week on TV shows like The Bachelor, we see him kissing, participating in nude photo shoots and creating moments of deep intimacy with women he barely knows.  Before this season is over, I can bet he would’ve had sex with any number of those women vying to be the chosen one.

Sex Is A Big Deal
A minute ago while checking my inbox, I ran across an article titled Letting Go Of Your Sexual Past written by Barbara Wilson.  Here’s what she said, “Sex is a big deal.  One of the biggest lies our culture has told us is that sex is just physical.  We can have sex and then move on without thought or consequence to the next partner, repeating the cycle until finally we get married.  And then poof: All past lovers are instantly erased from our memories.  Sounds magical, doesn’t it? But it’s not true.  Sex is a bond, an invisible bond that works like super human glue, attaching us permanently to all past lovers.  Emotionally and spiritually, as well as physically — whether we’re married or single.”


Something to think about…

What say you…what are your thoughts on today’s sexual culture? Is purity possible today?

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{ 10 comments… read them below or add one }

Shaunda January 28, 2014

The sexual culture is out of control, with God purity is possible but, not easy. Most men say they understand but in the long run I don’t think they will last. Most have several sexual partners waiting to give them what they want without a true commitment.


Yvonne Chase January 28, 2014


Purity like promiscuity is a choice. I too believe its possible. And you’re right, as long as men have a choice of sexual partners, true commitment is off the table.


Mr. Malcolm January 28, 2014

Purity is especially difficult when people date for years on end.


Yvonne Chase January 29, 2014

@Mr. Malcolm,

You’re right. Perhaps knowing the end at the beginning would help.


Catherine Gacad January 29, 2014

it’s possible, but definitely challenging given the sexually-overcharged culture we live in. i want to raise my child to wait before engaging in intimacy so i love your bolded quote in your post. my husband and i debate about this all the time, as we want to do the right thing, and shelter and educate our child to have self-respect.


Yvonne Chase January 30, 2014


This culture is definitely sexually overcharged. Its on steroids for Gods sake!

I wish you and your husband the best as you impart morality and strong values and self-respect into your child. I don’t envy you:-)


Kim February 1, 2014

On the flip side, it would be nice if the attitude of some isn’t that anyone who has sex before marriage is somehow immoral or sinful. It smacks of judgmental nonsense. I won’t mock or criticize those who choose to remain pure before marriage and I’d appreciate if those in that camp would not rush to judge those of us who have had sex outside of marriage.


Yvonne Chase February 1, 2014


In the words of the late Eleanor Roosevelt, “No one can make you feel inferior without your consent.”

Like I told someone earlier today, I believe the words judging and judgmental are sorely misused today.

Thanks for your comment.


Rabia @TheLiebers February 7, 2014

My husband and I ae each other’s only and I like it that way. I have three kids that I want to raise to understand, appreciate and practice purity. I hope and pray that our voices are louder and more persistent that society’s.


Yvonne Chase February 7, 2014


I share the same hope and prayer that our voices are louder and more persistent than society’s. Society’s voice is persistent!


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