Loretta Is Responsible For Her Relationship Status

by Yvonne Chase on August 28, 2014

You Would Think They’re Married
Let me start off by saying I am not a fan of Noel Jones.  With that said, he is not responsible for Loretta’s relationship status.  Their story is played out week after week on The Preachers Of LA.  Here’s the story; Noel and Loretta have been in a relationship for 17 years and they are unmarried.  She plays the role of “First Lady,” they run a business together, share a dog plus she has access to his home and every major area of his life. If you didn’t know any better, you would think they’re married.  Oh and they want us to believe they’re not having sex 17 years in.

Loretta
Highly Defensive and Heated
Loretta gets highly defensive and heated when anyone asks her about her relationship with Noel. I read some of last night’s tweets and one stood out to me; “I’m with Bishop Ron’s wife on this one.  Bishop Jones knows he wrong for dating that lady for 17 years.” Lavette, Bishop Ron’s wife had several conversations with Loretta about her relationship with Noel.  She doesn’t like it.  She thinks its inappropriate.  She doesn’t like how it looks to onlookers.  She thinks it taints their witness as Christians.  As a happily married woman, she wants better for Loretta.  In last night’s episode, Loretta and Lavette got into a heated exchange and Loretta basically told Lavette to mind her business.

Loretta

Loretta Is In Control Of Loretta
Sure, as a single pastor, Noel is very wrong for dating Loretta for 16 years BUT, he couldn’t date Loretta for 17 years if she didn’t’ let him. He’s not in control of Loretta. Loretta is in control of Loretta. Too many women are in situations like Loretta waiting around on a man to make a decision about her life.  They ask questions like:

  • Is he gonna marry me?
  • How long is he going to date me before he pops the question?
  • Does he want to get married?
  • What does he want?

Those are all the wrong questions.  The questions should be:

  • Do I want to get married?
  • Do I want to marry this clown?
  • How much longer will I let him date me before he puts a ring on it?
  • What do I want?

Take Back Your Power
When you ask these types of questions, you take back your power. You put yourself back in the drivers seat of your life.  Its not about Noel Jones.  Its about Loretta!  There are two things Loretta and you need to do if you are walking in her shoes:

Step 1: Figure out your timeline.  How long will you wait to get what you want? Are you willing to wait 16 years like Loretta? I hope not! Last night on the after show, the host asked Loretta if she would marry Noel if he proposed.  She said, “To be honest, my perspective of marriage has changed from the time I met him until where we are now. I’m happy with the way things are now, but if he proposed to me I would accept.”

Committed To Being Uncommitted
Noel’s was shocked at her answer.  His response was, “”Anytime you hear something that you never heard before in that light, it calls for some introspective meditation.  At some point I have to take a look at my relationship now, which has a shift in this step.” Introspective mediation my foot! Why is he shocked Loretta would marry him? He’s given her intimate access to his life for over two decades.  I agree with this tweet: “Noel Jones doesn’t have commitment issues….he’s committed to being uncommitted!” Clearly!

Step 2: Make sure you’re on the same page.  Loretta should have taken this step 17 years ago.  The person you’re dating is not a mind reader therefore it’s up to you to speak up about what you want and where you see your relationship life going.  Lay your cards on the table and let the chips fall where they may. You’re not giving him an ultimatum; you’re communicating what you want. If he gets scared and runs, thank God and count your blessings. You’re on the way to meeting a guy who wants what you want when you want it and how you want it.

Headed To The Altar
Remember, this is your love life. You get to steer it in any direction you want.  Staying in a stagnant relationship blocks the path for the right guy. A marriage minded man could’ve been eyeballing Loretta all along but he went the other way because he thinks she and Noel are headed to the altar.

Something to think about…

What say you? What do you think about the relationship between Loretta and Noel Jones ? Should a pastor remain single until he’s ready to marry?

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{ 8 comments… read them below or add one }

Anjuan Simmons August 28, 2014

I think that anyone (pastor or not) should not get married until they are ready to get married. However, that “readiness” has to be guided by that person’s ability to remain chaste, the perception of that person’s singleness by believers and non-believers, and if that person wants to have children (since risk for birth defects are linked to the chronological age of both the man and the woman).

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Yvonne Chase August 29, 2014

@Anjuan,

No one should marry until they are ready. Remaining chaste is the issue with Noel Jones and any other pastor for that matter. If you can remain chaste while dating a woman for 17 years, then its all good. The other issue is the perception of his singleness. Not a good look to believers and especially unbelievers. He’s not setting a good example no matter how you slice it.
Yvonne Chase recently posted…Married At First Sight: You Don’t Have To Try Before You BuyMy Profile

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George Scheide August 28, 2014

I’m just glad I haven’t been watching that show. 17 years? Wow! Maybe they get along great because they aren’t married. There’s nothing wrong with staying single. I Corinthians 7:2 says that plainly. If I was there I’d probably question their roles in the church, but I don’t know enough about the situation to be their critic. That’s the business of those people.

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Yvonne Chase August 29, 2014

@George,

There’s absolutely nothing wrong with staying single…IF you can remain chaste as Anjuan said in his comment above. That’s where the rubber meets the road for many single Christian men/people.

If you’re single, dating a woman exclusively in a relationship that looks like marriage, having babies out of wedlock with other women etc., then you ought to go find yourself a wife and live in obedience to Gods word.
Yvonne Chase recently posted…Married At First Sight: You Don’t Have To Try Before You BuyMy Profile

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Danielle Wallace August 31, 2014

I absolutely love this article! These are my thoughts entirely on this situation. God’s word never changes and we should live accordingly. Love your website!

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Yulunda September 3, 2014

Hello Yvonne –

I have been saved since I was eight years old, and my belief system is all inclusive. You believe all of the Word or non at all. There is no way that a man (of the cloth) should not honor the Word and the woman and grant her the blessing of being his wife.

The entire episode had me vexed as I cannot believe that he would expect such a level of commitment and defense (of him) from her YET. When he said to Loretta, “…you get them!” I was like, WOW! You’re the Shepherd, right?

How can someone say they are not “READY” for marriage when all of your actions are of the marriage type.

It is sad that she has committed so much of her life to him and she cannot even file an insurance claim should something happen to him. Okay, sorry, that was so tacky! “My Bad.”

But, my husband and I will be married 15 years tomorrow and honey, I am fully vested and covered by the blood and more.

Pastor’s such as Noel are very powerful and role models to so many and he must stop his selfish behavior for the calling he has on his life.

God Bless him and Loretta and all of those in the same boat as they need a life raft.

Thank you for your honesty and forthrightness!
Yulunda recently posted…Are you a man or woman of honor?My Profile

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Yvonne Chase September 4, 2014

@Yulanda,

Amen to all of this: How can someone say they are not “READY” for marriage when all of your actions are of the marriage type.

If you’re not ready for a relationship or marriage then you should not be a part of a situation that mirrors it. Noel Jones is a clown! I can’t with him…
Yvonne Chase recently posted…Married At First Sight: You Don’t Have To Try Before You BuyMy Profile

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Mary Dobbins September 4, 2019

Larreta is smart individual. She’s is nobodies fool, and I think she knows exactly what she’s doing. He have told her, he did not want to marry in the beginning. He haven’t lied to her. So she’s getting what she wants. That’s being seen and controlling his lifestyle. By being with a rich and powerful man ! And she gets everything paid for. She go we’re she want to. And he does the same thing. They are both ok with it! Until the tv show ! She didn’t care until Gibson and his wife started talking! They both know the Bible ! Bishop Noel Jones is Amanda after God own heart ! Woman run after guys like him all the time. And she’s like being his friend, to put it likely ! She’s getting the world, to help her get what she wants. He pays her well for her services! She’s not a baby or a young woman ! She’s well over 24yrs of age ! She know the game more then Bishop Noel Jones Do ! It’s not fair to just judge him ! Pray for both of them ! Something are like witchcraft ! When a person can’t leave someone alone and don’t know why ! She’s not innocent ! I have met many people that mix Holy and un Holy things together! It’s called witchcraft! He just might Be under her spell ! That’s why he can’t forgive him self for his devoice from his first wife ! And she Loretta knows it ! Hell I just had two men in my life ! Hell what do I know ! Pray for me ! I don’t need soulish prayers ! Keep those ! I will send them back to Hell ! Then all of a sudden his daddy dies ! And then his mother ! And he get Cancer! This sound fishy to me ! Pray For Real !

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