Marriage Advice From A Single Woman

by Yvonne Chase on April 29, 2013

Marriage Advice
Earlier today while surfing the web, I ran across a comment from a married woman who said something about unmarried people giving out marriage advice.  She has a problem with those people.  Do you?

Something to Think About
I’m one of those people.  I’m unmarried and I give out marriage advice.   Well I don’t go around advising people on their marriage unless of course they ask and even then it depends on how I feel and the depth of their circumstance but I do write about marriage with the intent of giving you “Something to think about.”  My most recent posts about marrying young generated a good discussion.

Quantity vs Quality
Let me say this, just because you’re married, doesn’t make you an expert on marriage.  And just because you’ve been married a long time doesn’t mean you have a great marriage.  Quantity has nothing to do with quality.  While I won’t let anyone control my decision to marry, many of the marriages closest to me make me happy to be single.

Jesus Was Single
When it comes to advice, what I offer is rooted in Biblical truth.  Let me make a bold statement; if the marriage advice you offer isn’t rooted in Biblical truth, its bad advice.  God created marriage and it doesn’t work without the advice in his manual the Bible.  While I can certainly understand the thinking that says a single person is not qualified to give marriage advice, all of that goes out the window when we look at Paul and Jesus who were both single.

Dead and Headed for Divorce
For whatever reason, God has given me an extra measure of wisdom in the area of marriage.  More importantly, he’s given me a serious love for people, a deep understanding of people specifically the dynamic between men and women and an even deeper understanding of relationships and that’s what marriage is; a relationship.  I believe in marriage.  I think it’s a good thing therefore any advice I give is always to preserve the union.  I’ve helped tons of couples look at marriage through fresh eyes and I’ve kept many marriages alive that were once dead and headed for divorce.

Does It Matter Who’s Giving It?
Many  couples I’ve never met have spent time here at my website then sent me a tweet or an email letting me know that something I wrote helped them look at their marriage anew.  As long as God continues to give me wisdom, I plan on sharing it with whoever wants to listen.  I mean if the advice helps your situation, does it really matter who’s giving it?

marriage
Something to think about…

What say you? Would you take marriage advice from a single person? Why? Why not? Have you ever received any good marriage advice from a single person? If yes, please share it in the comments. 

{ 4 comments… read them below or add one }

P. Smith April 29, 2013

All I know is I’m still married today and enjoying my marriage because of you and the many hard, in my face conversations you’ve had with me.

I remember when I was thinking about walking away from my wife and kids…you put it all in perspective and made me rethink my actions. You’ve made me look at myself and look at marriage/my marriage in a way I never looked at it.

Every book you recommended helped and everything you said to me has made a difference. I would’ve made the biggest mistake of my life if it weren’t for you.

So, to those that think you shouldn’t be giving marriage advice because you’re unmarried, tell them not to listen.

God bless you!

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Lavita April 30, 2013

Amen and amen! I just had a conversation with a friend this morning who likes to tell me that I don’t understand because I haven’t been married for 18 years. My response was that 18 years of marriage has nothing to do with common sense and operating according to God’s will instead of your own!

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Yvonne Chase May 3, 2013

I didn’t wake up one day with a desire to advise married couples. Its a gift from God that grew stronger after losing my brother. We talked a lot about his marriages and the many challenges that came as a result of his illness.

God has given me a lot of wisdom in the area of relationships and I won’t be bullied into silence just because married people think I should have nothing to say. If I can help, I will.

Glad I could help you P.

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Shah Ross October 24, 2013

I think a good, long, hard, historical look at both the Bible and marriage in in order. Alot of people who make (and attempt to adhere to) these “Biblical truths”, are not aware of the historical and cultural perspectives that were prominent of the time periods in question.

Her’es a bold statement: most contemporary women would rather chop off their own heads, than be transported back in time to the “Biblical days”. Women were used/seen/treated as chattel, property, and second class citizens in the Bible. There are numerous Biblical references to this, in both the Old and New Testaments.

Statements like “finding a wife”, “took a wife”, etc, don’t mean what the average Bible believer thinks it means. Alot of the “Men of God” in the Bible that were betrothed to a woman/women (you realize that God did not condemn polygamy, yes?), were not always “married” under “holy” circumstances.

Oh, and as far as “Jesus being single”….. There are people who would refute that statement, citing Mary Magdelane as proof. The “evidence” on both sides is quite compelling.

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