#MarriedAtFirstSight S3 Episode 8 Recap
January 21, 2016 Marriage

He Seemed Desperate
Before the new season of #MarriedAtFirstSight premieres, there’s a matchmaking special that shows the process of how each couple is matched.  As I watched the special, David, who is currently matched with Ashley stood out to me and not for good reasons.  I wouldn’t have chosen him for the show.  He seemed desperate like he wanted to be married too badly and for all the wrong reasons.  

Treats Him Like He Has Leprosy
After watching the first three weeks of the current season, it looks like David is desperate because, in the most recent episode, he said he is falling in love with Ashley; a woman who treats him like he has leprosy. How are you possibly falling in love with someone who treats you so poorly? Do you like abuse? I don’t get it! What’s really going on with you David? She cringes and gives you the stink eye when you any attempts at getting close to her.

She Says She Wants To Be Married
While the good old folks on Twitter would like me to give Ashley a pass, I cannot and I will not.  There was no mandatory draft for #MarriedAtFirstSight.  She signed up to do this show willingly because she says she wants to be married.  Married to what, I ask.  She’s more into her dog Belle than she’s into David.  In addition, her level of deep anxiety and fear are very strange.  I’ve never seen anything like it! She seems to be terrified all the time! 

Women Don’t Want Nice Guys
As desperate as David came off in the matchmaking special, he does seem to be a very nice guy.  But you know what, one of my boys said a guy can’t just be nice. Women don’t want nice guys.  He’s got to be nice and something else; nice and funny, nice and stylish, nice and financially secure, nice and well connected etc.  Ladies, is that true?

It’s Time To Give Your Type A Rest
Week after week after week, Ashley moans about how she is not attracted to David as if she expected to be matched with David Beckham.  She’s stuck on a physical type and admitted that she focused a lot on physical attraction in previous relationships.  Guess what Ashley, if your type were working, you wouldn’t be on #MarriedAtFirstSight.  It’s time to give your type a rest and give David and your marriage a fighting chance.  Question, can a relationship/marriage move forward without sexual attraction?

Short End Of The Stick
And then there’s Neil and Sam.  Seems like the good guys definitely got the short end of the stick this season.  There’s a notion out there that says women are more prepared and ready for marriage than men, however, this season of #MarriedAtFirstSight proves otherwise.  Sam is so abusive to Neil to the point that it’s unacceptable.  She kicked him out of her place in the latest episode just because he made a joke that hit too close to home for her.  What a selfish brat! Neil should’ve never agreed to move back into her place. They should’ve stayed put where they were and used their deep level of discomfort to motivate them into finding a better place sooner.

Independent Working Man
Neil can’t win with Sam. She got mad at him for not speaking up about moving into her place temporarily with her roommate. Why on earth did she even think that was a good idea? He could’ve shut it down immediately but he gave it a shot.  Any woman would know, stranger or not, that no man wants to move into YOUR place with you AND a roommate! Neil was an independent working man fully capable of taking great care of himself before he met Sam.

Midst Of The Storm
One of my Twitter peeps thinks Sam needs to be with a more stand up guy.  That wouldn’t work either. Based on what she’s shown me, I’m sure she’d find a way to emasculate him quickly.  The problem is Sam, not Neil or any other guy. Could Neil man up a bit more? Sure he could but he was matched with Sam because she’s man enough for everyone in their marriage.  Two bulldozers sharing the same space would be a lot to deal with 24/7.  Neil is the calm we all need in the midst of the storm.

One And Done
Looks like it will be one and done this season.  Vanessa and Tres seem to be the only couple on track to staying married.  We shall see within the next few weeks.  Listen, if you’re reading this and plan on signing up for season 4 of #MarriedAtFirstSight, here are a few things you need to do and know:

1.You will be matched with a total stranger.  A stranger is someone you have not met before and do not know.  

2.  You may not be instantly attracted to this total stranger.  That’s expected.  Give it a chance.  Attraction can grow.

3.  You willingly signed up for the show.  No one put a gun to your head and made you do it, therefore, you need to be all in and give it your 100% best shot.  Dr. Logan Levkoff one of the expert agrees and says, “The only way to do #MarriedAtFirstSight is to be ALL IN. 100%.

4.  Watch and study seasons 1, 2 and 3 to get a crystal clear idea of what to expect.

5.  Know that all of social media will be watching and commenting on what you show us.  If you can’t take the heat, do not put yourself in the #MarriedAtFirstSight kitchen.  It gets real HOT in there!

6.  Communication is required of you.  You must talk.  You must share. You must be transparent if you want to be known and get to know your spouse.

Something to think about…

What say you? What else would you add to the list of things to do and know before signing up for #MarriedAtFirstSight? What are your thoughts on Sam and Ashley? David and Neil? Can a relationship/marriage move forward without sexual attraction?

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"12" Comments
  1. “A stranger is someone you have not met before and do not know.” DEAD! You are so funny! I follow you on Twitter. Your tweets are the realist!

    I agree with you. Looks like it will be one and done this season. Sam is horrible and I can’t figure Ashley out. Why did she sign up for this.

    Can’t wait to see how this ends.

    P.S. On another note, I almost spit my tea yesterday when you tweeted, “When does the prayer meeting start for Stacey Dash?” Hilarious!

    • Yvonne’s Stacey Dash tweet is priceless! Like someone else on Twiiter said Dash is competing with Raven Simone for the kookiest. Lol!
      Diane Robertson recently posted…Life Passages XVIII-My Profile

    • @Karen,

      I’m just saying!! The show is called Married At First Sight. Clearly you’ve never seen this person. Why act all surprised and nutty about it? I don’t know why Ashley signed up for this. I seriously cannot figure her out. Her level of terrification makes me wonder how she leaves her house in the morning. She’s afraid of everything!

      LOL about Stacey Dash. I couldn’t help myself after hearing her “Clueless” statements. Found out today she has a book coming out in June. Get ready for more clueless statements. She has a book to sell.
      Yvonne Chase recently posted…Ladies, His Decision To Marry Has Nothing Do With YouMy Profile

  2. I don’t remember the matchmaking special to be able to speak to what I thought of David at the time.

    You are correct, how can he fall in love with a woman who treats him this poorly? I think he is mistaking falling in lust with her with falling in love.

    “Her level of deep anxiety and fear are very strange. I’ve never seen anything like it! She seems to be terrified all the time! ”

    Well said. I even catch myself thinking perhaps she is a man afraid to be found out. I know, I know….that’s how strange her behaviour is to me. I mean come on, can you honestly be THIS uncomfortable being around what you say is a nice guy that you AGREED at the altar to marry?

    “You know what, one of my boys said a guy can’t just be nice. Women don’t want nice guys. He’s got to be nice and something else; nice and funny, nice and stylish, nice and financially secure, nice and well connected etc. Ladies, is that true?”

    Hm…not sure what to make of this, except to say he comes off as saying all what women would want in a nice guy is the “something else”…the sense of humour, the style, the finances. That women can’t connect with nice, so you better have the something else for her to even consider a relationship with you. Isn’t “nice” all about a man treating you well, which will mean he is of good character? To say women don’t want a nice guy is to say women are shallow. I am convinced that women who don’t know what to do with a nice guy have had a chaotic upbringing to where bad-boy drama is their comfort-zone. The pull of the familiar.

    “Can a relationship/marriage move forward without sexual attraction?”

    No. Physical attraction is crucial because sex is crucial in a marriage. That said, sexual attraction is not always there at first sight. In many cases it is not instant. It comes after you’ve opened yourself to exploring the possibility of liking and then loving the other person. Ashley, is not even making an attempt to open up to that possibility.

    Frankly, I now think she is probably honestly unable to open-up. She seems emotionally locked-up for some reason. As if even she can’t control it…like a cloud she is not able to shake. Could she be suffering from depression?

    “It’s Time To Give Your Type A Rest”

    Oh, how many Mr. Rights we women overlook because they come wrapped in a box we don’t recognise because we are stuck on a ‘type’. Busy praying over our list of what we want in a man, yet letting a man carrying that list inside him slip away cause he is in a container that does not resemble the bad-boys that left us.

    Oh gawwd, and then there was Sam!
    Where do I even begin? Talk about not knowing what to do with nice. Makes me wonder how much nice she grew up in. She is corrosive to Neil on so many levels, it grates on me.

    I agree, Neil should have not agreed to move into Sam’s house although I think he agreed to it because he is willing to try anything to show his commitment. That said, I agree with him when he says moving back home is probably what Sam wanted to do afteral. In my mind, this way she can be in the experiment without being immersed in it. How cunning! It was lame of her to kick him out based on what he said. Are you kidding me? She wanted to get away from him and pounced on what he said as a convenient scapegoat.

    To your to-do list for future candidates, I add…
    Know thyself! Know yourself enough to recognise what traits, in a partner, makes you compatible. Some opposite traits, some similar. Also, so you are aware of why you gravitate to your type that has not worked.

    Grow up! When you leave the altar, you really ARE married. You are hand in hand with what you said you want. A husband or a wife. So, behave your way to the feelings.

    I hate to think that some of these women over these season are letting what would be great husbands slip away because they are too immature to get out of their own way.

    • @Mmabatho,

      David is desperate to be married that’s why he’s falling in love with a woman who treats him so poorly. I wish you could see the matchmaking special.

      LOL at “She’s a man afraid to be found out.” That’s exactly how she acts. Her behavior is beyond strange.

      I get what my friend meant. Women walk over guys who are just nice every day. He’s called corny, lame, etc. But they quickly jump on a nice guy with something else.

      Yes to all of this: “Grow up! When you leave the altar, you really ARE married. You are hand in hand with what you said you want. A husband or a wife. So, behave your way to the feelings.” Well said; behave yourself into your feelings.
      Yvonne Chase recently posted…Do Your Part And Let God Do The RestMy Profile

  3. Yvonne, once again BRILLIANT analysis!
    I particularly appreciate the deduction that David was desperate before he was matched an his proclamation that he is falling for a woman who treats him worse than a dog-with no effort to a process SHE signed up for and is 3 seasons oin-is quite alarming.

    As for Ashley, she’s just plain weird. I mean book smart but clueless about she needs in a man. You said it right. If what she was attracted was worked ng why the heck involve experts. Didn’t she give them a PIC of her dream guy. Geez!

    As for Sam, some may disagree or be displeased with my comment but Sam comes across like a man to me. She may be suited with a hyper alpha male who will bark louder than her but then again I may be wrong. Smh!

    I’m said it before and I’ll say it again. Please let Sean from S2 or David, and Neil from this season know I’m available. 🙂

    Keep the real insight can’t Ming Yvonne. I wish FYI had an aftershow with you hosting after each episode.

  4. @Diane,

    David’s desperation jumped out to me immediately. It was an instant red flag and I remember sitting in my living room saying, he does not belong on the show. His reasons for wanting marriage are not good. Like marriage is not your savior. Please watch it if you haven’t.

    Mmabatho said it best, she really does act like she’s a man afraid to be found out. What gives with her? Why is she always so terrified and afraid?

    Nice Guys Finish Last starring Sean V, David and Neil is coming to your TV Fall 2016. Stay tuned… I kid but FYI should go out of their way to find a nice woman for each of them after all the misery they’ve been through at the hands of #MarriedAtFirstSight.
    Yvonne Chase recently posted…Gender Stereotypes Are Ruining Our RelationshipsMy Profile

    • @Yvonne,
      The funny thing is, I didn’t read Mmabatho’s comment before I offered that Sam’s behavior resembled a man’s rather than a woman. I have also read tweets suggesting that Twitter has been too harsh on both she and Ashley but the reality is that Sam is making lots of demands on Neil to behave like a man but then she isn’t behaving quite like a lady. We ought to be what we want to attract (I’m working on that myself).

      Also Yvonne, I will be sure to re-read my comments to ensure that autocorrect doesn’t slaughter my words. No more illegible comments from me moving forward. 🙂

      Again brilliant insight. Keep them coming.
      Diane G. Robertson recently posted…Life Passages XVIII-My Profile

  5. @Diane,

    Ashley and Sam are harsh on Twitter with their horrible behavior. Twitter is only commenting on what they show us. Notice, they’re not saying the same about Vanessa. Why? Because Vanessa is being mature about the situation and not acting like a bratty, selfish child.

    I figured you left the comment from your phone. I know you are much smarter than a 5th grader:-)

    P.S. Mmabatho was referring to Ashley’s behavior that is so bizarre it makes you wonder if she’s a man afraid to be found out. Get it? Hilarious!
    Yvonne Chase recently posted…Brandy Never Wants To Get Married And That’s OkayMy Profile

  6. Ah, I see. I get it now Yvonne. That is indeed Hilarious!!!
    OMG! Could you imagine if that’s true? Bananas!
    Looking forward to seeing how this week’s episode pans out.
    I love the clip of David calling Ashley out on hr level of effort, or lack thereof, thus far.
    Vanessa’s level of maturity is also commendable. She has her own insecurities and hang ups but she’s committing to the process. Agreed, well done!

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