Vivica Fox Regrets Not Having Children But You Don’t Have To

by Yvonne Chase on October 14, 2014

Her Biggest Regret
Over the weekend, actress Vivica A. Fox sat down with Oprah Winfrey and revealed her biggest regret; not having children.  Watch and we’ll talk after…

A Six Pack And A Smile
During her child bearing years, she said she dated a six pack and a smile.  She was married to a guy named Sixx Nine then she dated rapper 50 Cent and then she dated a promoter in Atlanta named Omar Slim.  She says she dated the same guy with a different name.  I’d say 50 Cent and Omar Slim are one in the same.  

Date With That In Mind
As I watched the interview, I thought about the many women I know who are wasting their time with guys who aren’t worth their time.  A man can have kids at fifty.  You can’t.  If you want to have kids, you need to date with that in mind. Your biological clock is real.  One day it will stop ticking.  You don’t want to be end up in a mad rush in your late forties trying to find someone to marry and have children.  

Dating Around And Having Fun
All this talk about dating around and having fun gets real old after awhile furthermore, most women don’t know how to date around.  Dating around means going on one or two first dates not becoming a serial monogamist breaking up with a new guy every three years.  Dating around means you’re focused on gathering information to see who’s a good fit for what you want.  You ought to be able to discern if a man is interested in what you want in a couple of dates.  You don’t need a lifetime to do that.  

Break Up With Him
If he doesn’t want to get married and have children and that’s something you want, its time to break up with him.  Jordin Sparks comes to mind as I write this post.  Allegedly her relationship ended because she wanted to get married and her ex wasn’t ready.  One of the comments on that post said, “I think women do ourselves a disservice being so focused on getting married.  Find yourself first.  Explore every nook and cranny of your life.  Date. Have fun.  Men like to pursue. The right one will find you. Or not. Live your life. Being so needy is unattractive. Men like confident women.” 

Focus On Having Children
I disagree with every word of that comment.  You only need to find yourself if you’re lost.  You can explore every nook and cranny of your life with a spouse or while you look for a spouse.  Life doesn’t stop because you want to be married.  A woman isn’t needy because she wants to marry.  A confident woman knows what she wants and isn’t afraid to speak it or go after it.  If you want to be married, you should absolutely focus on being married.  If you want to have children, you should absolutely focus on having children otherwise you just might end up like Vivica Fox I mean don’t we laser focus on everything else we want in life? Why leave getting married and having children to chance?

Something to think about…

What say you? Is focusing on marriage and children a bad idea? How do we get what we want if we don’t focus on getting it? 

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Yulunda October 14, 2014

I heard a sermon a while back and the preacher said, “You get what you focus on.” And, he was right on point. We must be strategic with the things we desire in life and stop leaving things up in the air.

I told my friend the other day, at our age, if I was not married, I would be dating with purpose. I am would not just be going around dating men for the sake of it. Nope, I would be interviewing him the whole time and trying to find what type of retirement plan and goals he has – LOL, Is that wrong?

I LOVED this, “You ought to be able to discern if a man is interested in what you want in a couple of dates. You don’t need a lifetime to do that.”

Great post!

Yvonne Chase October 15, 2014


Not wrong at all. That is the way to date around…interview, ask questions, gather information then make a decision. That does not and should not take a lifetime.
Yvonne Chase recently posted…Does The Man Determine When A Woman Gets Married?My Profile

AwesomelyOZ October 15, 2014

That’s definitely a tough thing to admit, esp to an entire media outlet. I think you’re right that women can focus on what they need to without sacrificing any other aspect of their lives. I feel we’ve reached a point where a woman is expected to focus so much on career and the family conundrum has taken a complete back burner to the point we’re too afraid to even admit we want it or deserve it. Have a great one Yvonne! -Iva
AwesomelyOZ recently posted…GTFO: Beyond the Ten Commandments – 7 You May Not Be Aware OfMy Profile

Yvonne Chase October 16, 2014


Definitely tough to admit. I see that a lot in Hollywood. Women get caught up in careers and dating bad boys meanwhile her biological clock is ticking, ticking, ticking. Maybe she will adopt. There’s more than one way to become a mother.
Yvonne Chase recently posted…If You Don’t Date, You Won’t FornicateMy Profile

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