If You Want A Partner You Gotta Act Like A Partner

by Yvonne Chase on April 13, 2015

Realized The Error Of Her Ways
Jaclyn turned me into a fan on the latest episode of Married At First Sight.  She finally realized the error of her ways.  The way she’s been treating her husband wouldn’t get her the outcome she wants.   She’s been treating him like her  buddy and and she’s been acting like one of the boys at the bar and not his wife.  Calling him “dude” and “bro” every third minute does not lend itself to the intimate/romantic relationship she’s wanted for the past 7 years.  

Sometimes We Get In Our Own Way
She said, “If I want a partner, I have to act like a partner.  I don’t know how I can say I wanted a partner all this time when I haven’t been acting like a partner.”  High five Jaclyn!  Sometimes we get in our own way.   Last week she was ordering food for him like his mother and this week she was teaching him how to float and doing it as if she were his mother.  Then they went Salsa dancing and she tried to lead.  Ryan has to put his foot all the way down in this relationship and step up and be the man he is otherwise Jaclyn will run him over and reverse and he won’t know what happened.

Something Ain’t Right With Him
While Jaclyn turned me into a fan, Ryan D. scared me.  There’s something creepy about that guy in an ax murder kind of way.  I can’t quite put my finger on it yet, but something ain’t right with him.  It was evident last night when he stormed out of the restaurant at date night with his wife Jessica.  She confronted him about a comment he made about her piercing…she thought he called it trashy and that sent him over the edge.  Her feelings were hurt by what she thought he said. When he cleared up exactly what he said; it looks nice on her, but piercings and tattoos are trashy, that wasn’t enough for her.  She  kept forcing the issue.  He did tell her earlier he had a problem with anger when he was younger.  Maybe he still does?

partner

Bad Timing
I think Jaclyn and Ryan R. will be fine in the end.  Not sure about Jessica and Ryan D. or Sean and Davina who doesn’t think Sean is attentive enough to her emotional needs.  I think she’s a tad bit too needy and perhaps her timing is off.  In one instance, when they were getting ready to ski, something he’d never done, she decided to share a sentimental story about her mom.   Sean heard her but he was focused on getting ready to ski so once she was done, he went to get his gloves and asked her if she wanted her gloves.  She was upset and felt he didn’t acknowledge her or her story.  She wonders if he heard her or if he even cares.  Sure he heard her and sure he cares but not at that moment.  Bad timing!

You’re Human Not A Programmed Robot
Men can’t multitask like women.  He was focused on doing something he’d never done before.  Men get off on that kind of thing.  I liked his response when she brought it to his attention.  He said, “Hearing that hurts.  I don’t want you to ever feel alone or upset.  You come across so stoic and so strong that I didn’t know I missed a moment.  I’m not gonna learn unless I make mistakes.  I’m getting to know you and the levels of comfort you need.”  He owned the fact that he could have given her more attention at that moment however, he didn’t know what she needed.  He then said, “I don’t want to upset her.  I don’t want to see her sad.  I want to do the right thing.”  Guess what Sean, you will upset her, you will see her sad and you won’t always do the right thing.  You’re human not a programmed robot.   

partner

So here’s what I’d like you to take away from this post:

If you want a partner, you gotta act like a partner.  A great friendship is the foundation for a great relationship, however, keeping your spouse in the friend zone could be problematic over time.   Be a great lover and a great friend.

Timing is everything.  Just because you want to talk about something, doesn’t mean the time is right.  Cool your heels and wait for an appropriate time.

Communicate your needs and wants to your mate.  If you want/need something, ask for it.  Your mate is not a mind reader.

Something to think about…

What say you? Did you watch the last episode? Who do you think will make it out of this bunch? 

Here are 2 things I’d like you to do now:

 1.  Leave a comment below

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{ 2 comments… read them below or add one }

AwesomelyOZ April 19, 2015

I definitely agree with you in that one must act like a partner to have one and be part of a team. It’s not easy work but if it’s the right person, they’re worth it. I read somewhere that growth is a very uncomfortable experience that sucks the whole way through. I believe learning to be a good partner to someone else is no different. Lol. 🙂 I’m watching the show right now, it’s cool because you’ve provided all the background info~! 🙂 Have a great one Yvonne! -Iva
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Yvonne Chase April 19, 2015

@Iva,

Is it your first time watching? Do you like it?

Now that she’s gotten past her crazy, I am now Jaclyn’s biggest cheerleader. I believe her and Ryan will be the break out couple this season. She understands she has to treat her husband like a husband and not one of the boys she shoots the breeze with at the bar.

This is true, “Growth is a very uncomfortable experience that sucks the whole way through.”
Yvonne Chase recently posted…Reality Rewind: A Pretty Face Doesn’t Mean A Pretty HeartMy Profile

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